So I called you after I finished watching a movie, a really cute movie that I thought you'd like.
I wanted to talk to you about it and how we could watch it when you come over tomorrow. I wanted to talk about our plans for the SDSU Open House and which places to visit. I wanted to tell you how scared I am about this earthquake that's supposed to happen in the upcoming week. I wanted to fall asleep on the phone with you, happy and excited for tomorrow.
I'm sorry I was upset, but it's hard to be so happy when you feel like everything's your fault. Sorry I didn't warn you before calling. Funny, because if you ever really wanted to talk to me, I'd drop whatever I was doing to talk to you. And sorry for wanting to have a conversation before sleeping; I just really like hearing your voice and talking to you about random stuff. And sorry for not sleeping when you told me to... because that's the reason why my mom made me sweep the floor. I wasn't asleep soon enough to dodge it because I didn't listen to you, not because you wanted to chill for a few more minutes before calling me. Sorry for all that. I'm really tough to be with huh?
I'm sorry I'm not constantly thankful and happy because "at least you're talking to me at all", I'm really trying to be happy. Because you do make me happy Michael, when you're not constantly trying to make me feel bad about a mistake I'm trying to fix. That's logical right? You understand? I really love you. And I'm trying to fix everything and get it back to where we used to be. It's just going to take a while, not only because you obviously need time, but because I feel like I ask for forgiveness everyday even though you supposedly already forgave me. I don't know where I am right now. Where we are...
Still figuring it out.
I love you, Michael.
